What is a lifeku?

A lifeku is a haiku about daily life. For those who are unfamiliar with haiku, it is a form of Japanese poetry usually about nature, "profound," and formatted in 3 lines of 5 syllables, 7 syllables, and 5 syllables. Feel free to check out some famous haikus if you still don't get it.

Comment. It'll make the popular kids like you.

Saturday, April 18

iPhone battery
Why do you die so quickly?
Please don’t, I need you

Friday, April 17

I recently stumbled upon this video of how Disney rips off their own previous animations for new ones... it's pretty bad. I guess people just aren't that creative anymore because it's almost the exact same drawings, not unlike that video that compares Forrest Gump and Benjamin Button. Yes. That is a truthful video.

Same Disney repeat
Can't you guys draw something new?
Self-copyright theft

Thursday, April 16: Reader Submission

I know that Wednesday is Reader Submission Day, but this one was too good to wait another 3 weeks for an open space... In response to my post about Franglais and the now-famous possessive donut's, Chris has decided to enlighten us on the subject of Denglisch. Now all we're missing is Spanglish... anyone got a Spanglish lifeku??

Chris explains:

"I hardcore have super feelings about your Franglais frustrations. Germans do the same thing. It's called 'Denglisch' and it's quite silly. While there are numerous examples, such as the ubiquitous 'Handy,' their word for 'cell phone,' and 'Happyend,' a literary term used to describe the plot arcs of American cinema, I think the universally premier example of Denglisch is their word for 'hip hop':

'Black Music.'

I kid you not. I can only wonder how many dorky German exchange students have gotten the snot beaten out of them in the States, when, on a Saturday night in their adopted home of Hotlanta or Chi-Town, they ask with great earnesty where they might go to dance to some Black Music.

Germans, please take note:
A 'happy ending' is not
what you think it is.

Hip-hop in Stuttgart
The kids call it 'Black Music'
But not in Oakland!

Of course, the phenomenon works through reverse culture shock, too. For a while I seasoned my English with German-like grammar and vocabulary. But it's been too long since I was there...

My Denglisch is gone
No longer, trips to the store,
"Going einkaufing!"

Wednesday, April 15: Reader Submission

This weeks reader submission comes from Mike, who tells a tale of discomfort that we all have known:

"Thursday night was low key and uneventful and I merely went out after work to have some wings and a beer. I felt fine and passed out like a baby before midnight. But around 4am, I woke up to this sharp burning sensation in my stomach. It was only minutes later before I was out my back door begging for mercy."

Teriyaki wings
why torture me and start a
wretched barf-a-thon?

Acid mouth flavor
Where's my Listerine bottle?
Swish, Spit, Rinse, Repeat

Tuesday, April 14

Friend staying with me
I love you but your boyfriend
Has got to go now

Monday, April 13


This is a Chateau. A French Chateau. A French Chateau where I just spent the night for the wedding of a friend, during which all sorts of shenanigans took place. Some of these shenanigans were fun, some were dangerous, and some were just plain inappropriate.

When you are staying in a chateau with 100 wedding guests, including the majority of your friends, you don't necessarily tell yourself that you need to sleep with the door locked... and you are making a terrible mistake. Because it's possible that you will be awoken at 6:30 in the morning by 30 people singing and chanting in your room, including some random guy you've never seen playing a guitar in the corner.
These people might yell at you, taunt you, make several failed attempts to expose your naked body from under the covers... and you may choose not to speak to them for a little while....

Drunk thirty-somethings
Champagne to the sleeping face

Sunday Poll: April 12


Think Fast: Easter