What is a lifeku?

A lifeku is a haiku about daily life. For those who are unfamiliar with haiku, it is a form of Japanese poetry usually about nature, "profound," and formatted in 3 lines of 5 syllables, 7 syllables, and 5 syllables. Feel free to check out some famous haikus if you still don't get it.

Comment. It'll make the popular kids like you.

Saturday, April 11

Spelling from England
Favourite, colour, neighbour
Why not drop the u’s?

Friday, April 10

In France, people use an exceptional amount of Franglais. This is the application of English words with a French accent in the middle of a French sentence. An example of this could be, "J'ai un super feeling avec les animaux" which means "I have a great feeling with animals." However, "I have a great feeling with animals" doesn't really mean the same thing in English, so this sentence could more appropriately be translated, "I get along well with animals." Another example of this Franglais can be noticed in the overusage of the word "hardcore" as in sentences like, "Putain, c'est trop hardcore" (meaning, "Sh** that's really hardcore). The French LOVE this word and will use it as often as possible.

When speaking Franglais, for some reason the speaker feels compelled to refer to everything in the plural such as un cookies, un muffins, or une chips (a cookies, a muffins, and a chips, respectively.) I've tried to explain that cookies can never be one, the "s" means by default there are at least 2, but they don't care. Now, having explained this Franglais business, I present for your approval the most bizarre of all Franglais mistakes:

That's right. Donut's. There not just inappropriately plural, they're possessive. These donut's own something and they're not letting go. Which brings us to:

Possessive donuts
You are not the boss of me
Let me live my life

Thursday, April 9

Recently in Paris it has been exceptionally beautiful outside. Warm, sunny, perfect blue skies with white fluffy clouds... and everybody's out to enjoy it. First of all you should know that the French love to talk about the weather, in general... all of the time. Second, Parisian people completely change when the sun comes out, shedding their faux frowns for light, happy smiles as they bask in the sun with some obscure juice like strawberry or melon. During moments like this, the outdoor cafe seating, or terrasse, becomes a full out war for the best places in the sun and once you get a good spot you don't move for a long time. Which brings us to:

Terrasse au soleil
Parisian snobbery
I’m better than you

Wednesday, April 8: Reader Submission

Today's reader submission comes from Alfonso, who responded to my personal request for lifekus inspired by life with no internet:

Internet go boom
1991 again
Where's my Sonic Youth?

Tuesday, April 7

I recently stumbled upon this article about a boy who killed his father in his sleep, but was apparently sleepwalking and therefore not responsible for what he did. Personally, I don't know if I believe that, but it certainly makes you think twice about falling asleep with the door unlocked:

Sleepwalking killer
Your dad should’ve locked the door
But you’re off scot-free

Monday, April 6


Strangers on the street
Please don't be afraid of my
Impromptu Jazz Hands

Sunday Poll: April 5

Think Fast: Jesus