What is a lifeku?

A lifeku is a haiku about daily life. For those who are unfamiliar with haiku, it is a form of Japanese poetry usually about nature, "profound," and formatted in 3 lines of 5 syllables, 7 syllables, and 5 syllables. Feel free to check out some famous haikus if you still don't get it.

Comment. It'll make the popular kids like you.

Saturday, November 15

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I think this one came to me when I was almost physically run over by at least 7 different quasi-blind, over-styled trendy boys:

Styled teenage boy
How can you even see with
Those bangs in your face

Friday, November 14

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Today's likefu goes out to a very special lady:

Your curried deviled
Eggs smell like bottled old fart
Please put them away

Thursday, November 13

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Let me just start by saying that the concept of "French Customer Service" is an oxymoron in and of itself, since service in France is either non-existent or a total joke. That being said, I still feel like plenty of Americans will feel where I'm coming from:

Useless salesperson
You have no idea what
You’re talking about

Wednesday, November 12

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We've already discussed how much I hate men who cry. The thing I hate almost as much as crybabies are wussy complainers that whine about everything. You're a man, suck it up for Christ's sake. Nobody cares that you didn't get enough sleep last night or that your iPod got stuck on Smashmouth's Allstar, which brings me to:

Hey whiny pants guy
Stop crying about your lame
Sandy vagina

Tuesday, November 11

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In my continuing fight against the feeling of being old, I am often set back when I encounter scantily clad teenage girls that seem to forget they are working:

You, skanky sales girl
“What can I do you for?” is
Not appropriate

Monday, November 10

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One of the things that I never miss about the States is the general volume of everybody around me, since people don't yell their business all up your space in Europe. However, I am sadly reminded of where I come from when I sit next to a table of loud American tourists who have just discovered their inner "French Touch." These people often consider themselves to be overnight experts in the areas of Parisian culture, wine, the French in general, cheese, and of course, Socialism. I often wish that they would shut up long enough to notice that they have attracted the attention of the entire restaurant:

Obnoxious people
At the table next to me
Take it down a notch