Saturday, May 9

Hirsute shirtless man
Your chest is like a sweater
Don’t you have heat stroke?

Friday, May 8

Gobbelty gook man
Nobody understands you
Try using real words

Thursday, May 7

I love how "the media" has become like a living entity... that compulsively lies and skews information to manipulate the public. Take my new best friend Swine Flu, for example. As if Bird Flu wasn't enough, now they want you to put down that delicious marinated chicken breast and while you're at it, don't touch that tasty bacon. Of course I wouldn't know that bacon is tasty, as Jews don't eat bacon and I definitely didn't eat bacon with my french toast at the diner the other day. No no, that was just someone who looks like me.

Be very afraid
New swine flu hysteria
Quick! Buy this new cure

Wednesday, May 6

Today's reader submission comes from Buzz, a loyal lifekuer with a special love for syllables. I think you will all find he speaks the Truth:

Dude with the new wheels
We are all truly impressed
Learn to drive a-hole

Challenges surround
Pissed off and low on patience
What would Cheryl do?

Tuesday, May 5

Little girl eating
Chocolate fingers away
My white pants nightmare

Monday, May 4

Logic-impaired man
When they were handing out sense
You received chump change

Sunday Poll: May 3

Oh no! Swine Flu...